Returning After Exploring Different Lands
“Dreaming of Spring II”, Aiken, SC, May 2026
Writer’s Note: This is a continuation of last week’s blog about when I left photojournalism. If you missed it, you can read “The Leaving” on its page on my site.
Hello Friend,
I was now an exile from the “Promised Land.”
What the hell was I thinking? We could have lived more frugally. We didn’t need a new car, right? We might have been able to reuse some of the baby’s diapers, right? Did I want to abandon my creative dream of being a news photographer for a few extra bucks? Oh, right, the Promised Land turned out to have lost some of its promise for me. I was stressed so badly my neck muscles were basically a bunch of corded rocks that barely allowed me to look to my left unless I turned my whole body. As photographers at our paper – and likely photographers at other papers – we were constantly told how much we were costing the company. And the paper was doing poorly because we were all so bad at our jobs. Oh, yeah, that’s why I was leaving that Promised Land.
The next Promised Land was what everyone said was the best place to make money and “make my mark in the world”: Sales! Since I didn’t think I could move into a whole new career, I made the lateral move to advertising sales, and went back to school to earn my MBA. This was still a jarring move, and everyone telling me I “went over to the Darkside.” I had been told for years how poorly newspapers were doing, and was crazy for even staying in them.
That was until our advertising department’s Christmas party. I didn’t even know newspapers had Christmas parties. Those were for business that were doing well, right? Come to find out, we were doing well. In fact, we were celebrating one of the strongest advertising years ever for the paper. I was part of that success, because I was part of a new office, and we were bringing in a lot of new advertisers. It was exciting to be finally told I was doing something good for the company and to be enjoying a party with my new friends.graphy to … something else.
“Gardenia Dream I” Aiken, SC, May 2026
But, when I stepped back to think about it, I had conflicting feelings. I loved photography, and was fairly good at it. Though, I had been told for years that my efforts to produce worthwhile images was actually a drag on the business. (I did note that the Christmas party was for advertising only. None of my newsroom friends were there, because the newsroom costs the company money.)So, maybe it was a good thing I left that part of my life and moved on to the better side of things. For the next 15 years I put aside my photography and told myself my earlier years were a nice experiment, but it was time to have a “real career” and make some money and support my family. (The irony of leaving for the money, was that it was about three years before this Promised Land produced even a little more than what I was making before the move.)
The sales chapters lasted about 12 years. After advertising, I changed over to copiers and then fiberglass. I was pretty successful in all of these, but I never felt very comfortable in that Promised Land. Looking back now, I think part of it was the creativity I enjoyed and was good at, wasn’t put to its best use inside these jobs. (And maybe because I was an introvert in a more extraverted land.) Though, during these years there was a subtle pull to always find ways to be creative outside of work. I had my little point-and-shoot, and made fun little DVD movies from the photos of my wife and daughter. I even made ones for each of my parents when they turned 80.
More recently, I’ve been exposed to a broader definition of what creativity might be. Maybe this is partly why I seem to enjoy, and am good at, my current career as a pricing analyst. I find I get something out of diving into data and coming up with creative solutions that really help the people I work with do their jobs better.
“Dreaming of Lily II” Aiken, SC, May 2026
This more contented feeling, also overlaps with my decision, about 10 years ago, to buy a DSLR. But, at first, I still had the attitude it was just a cute little thing to do every once in a while, and not something to take seriously. It took me a few years before I pushed myself and put the effort into being a photographer again. This tentative exploration back to a different section of my original Promised Land came with new ideas and experiences about what it means to be creative. And that meaning is much larger than my creation of photos or any other type of art.
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “life will always find a way.” I think creative pursuits are the same: “creativity will always find away.” From what I found in my life, and what I have heard from others who spent years, and even decades, away from their creative calling, those “middle years” were not a waste and just a way to get by in the meantime. It may be the creative career that was ours changed into something else. We don’t need to put aside or disavow those “middle years”; we can look at all of these different skills with new awareness. I believe we can always go forward by pulling in, once again, those special creative skills we loved and worked on for years, and start blending them with all of our other experiences in new and interesting ways.
“Gardenia in the Rain” Aiken, SC, May 2026
Yes, there are these inflection points where choices are before us and decisions are made. We might think how we “gave up” on our creative life, or how that creative life “gave up’ on us. Though, over time, what I find really interesting, is how often, when the opportunity arises, we find ways to return to our creative pursuits.
Just as I physically moved from the ocean, to the mountains, to the Big Sky, to the woodlands, my careers had very different looks and feels. It got me thinking of my moves from what I thought was one Promised Land to another. But, did I ever really leave? Or was I just checking out different areas of the same land?
I do think each of us has our own Promised Land that we are exploring; that keeps pulling us in directions we didn’t know we were heading to. And really, does it matter what part of the land we are leaving or returning to at the moment? Because, how much of our creativity comes from the land we are exploring and how much comes from within ourselves? It’s worth remembering, ultimately, where ever you go, there you are.
Thank you and keep creating what you do.
Patrick Krohn
June 2026